Gaming Together: How Shared Play Strengthens Relationships

It's surprisingly easy to spend a whole evening with someone without really doing anything together. Maybe you're both sitting on the couch, but one person is watching TV while the other is scrolling through their phone. There's nothing particularly wrong with that, especially after a long day, but it's different from sitting down and sharing an activity.

That's one of the things we like about games. They give people something to do together.

It doesn't have to be an elaborate game night, either. It might be a board game after dinner, a few rounds of Pokémon with your kid, or an hour spent trying to get through a co-op video game with your spouse. The game gives everyone something to focus on, and whatever happens from there gives you something to talk, laugh, argue, or celebrate about.

Sometimes that's really all you need.

Games Give the Conversation Somewhere to Go

There's something a little awkward about deciding you're going to sit down and have "quality time" with someone.

Games make that easier because you don't have to manufacture the interaction. Something is already happening.

Someone makes a terrible move. Somebody gets ridiculously lucky. You have to figure out a puzzle together. One person is absolutely convinced they understand the rules, only to discover they've been playing wrong for the last twenty minutes.

The conversation happens around the game.

That's especially nice when you're playing with someone you may not normally have long conversations with. Maybe it's your teenager, a sibling you haven't seen in a while, or a friend you usually only catch up with here and there. Having something in front of you takes some of the pressure off. You can just play.

You Don't Have to Be a "Gamer"

Playing games together doesn't mean everybody needs to suddenly take up gaming as a hobby.

Sometimes you've got twenty minutes after dinner, so you pull out something quick. Maybe your kid wants to teach you Pokémon, even though half the cards still don't make sense to you. Maybe you and your spouse try a cooperative game and discover that neither of you is particularly good at communicating under pressure.

It all counts.

You don't need the biggest collection or a regular game night on the calendar. You just need something everyone is willing to sit down and play.

And that's where choosing the right game becomes more important than choosing the "best" one.

The Right Game Depends on Who's Playing

A game can have great reviews and still be completely wrong for your group.

If you're introducing someone who rarely plays games, a three-hour strategy game with a forty-page rulebook probably isn't the best place to start. If someone at the table hates direct competition, you may have a better time working together in a cooperative game. And if you're playing with younger kids, something they can understand and participate in is usually going to work better than whatever happens to be the highest-rated game online.

The amount of time you have matters, too. Sometimes everybody is ready to settle in for an entire evening. Other times you've got half an hour before someone needs to leave.

Even personality makes a difference. Some families can spend an evening trying to destroy each other in a competitive game and laugh about it afterward. Other families should probably keep Monopoly in the closet for the sake of Thanksgiving.

The best game for playing together isn't necessarily the best game. It's the one your group actually wants to play.

Some Games Become Shared Hobbies

Sometimes a game sticks around long enough that playing it becomes only part of the fun.

Trading card games are a great example. You might start by learning Pokémon with your kid or picking up a couple of Magic decks with a friend. Before long, you're talking about cards when you aren't playing, changing your decks, checking out a new set together, or making plans for the next time you're going to sit down and play.

The same thing can happen with an ongoing board game campaign, a tabletop RPG group, or a multiplayer video game everyone keeps coming back to.

Eventually, the hobby gives you something to look forward to together.

You don't have to plan the conversation because there's always something to talk about. Someone has a deck idea they want to try. There's a new game coming out. You finally figured out how you're going to beat the boss that wiped everybody out last time.

And sometimes that shared interest starts pulling other people in, too.

You Probably Won't Remember Who Won

Think back to games you've played with friends or family years ago, and there's a good chance you don't remember the final score.

You might remember the ridiculous comeback nobody saw coming. The bluff that somehow worked. Somebody confidently misunderstanding a rule for half the game. The time one quick game after dinner somehow turned into three hours.

Maybe there's an inside joke from a game night that still gets brought up even though nobody remembers what game you were actually playing.

Those little moments have a funny way of sticking around.

It Doesn't Have to Be a Big Event

One of the easiest ways to never have a game night is to keep waiting until everybody has an entire evening free.

Sometimes you've got an hour on Saturday afternoon. Sometimes everyone happens to be sitting around after dinner and somebody pulls a game off the shelf. Maybe your kid asks if you want to play Pokémon and you've got time for two matches before bed.

That's enough.

If everybody has fun, maybe you play again next week. If the game doesn't click, put it back on the shelf and try something else next time.

There's no need to turn it into a project.

Finding Something You'll Actually Play

We see all kinds of people looking for games at Final Boss. Sometimes it's a parent trying to understand the card game their kid suddenly loves. Sometimes it's someone looking for something they can play with their spouse, or a group of friends who want something new to do together.

That's why knowing who you're playing with is usually more useful than simply asking, "What's a good game?"

Tell us who's playing. Let us know roughly how old everyone is, how much experience they have, how much time you've got, and what kinds of things your group already enjoys. If one person gets way too competitive or somebody absolutely refuses to read a giant rulebook, that's useful information too.

We can help you narrow things down from there.

You don't need a perfect game night. Find something everybody actually wants to play, put it on the table, and see what happens.